Juss want you to kno

kaiser9 @ 2004-08-18T22:08:00

2004-08-19T03:12:41Z

the stars will cry
the blackest tears tonight
and this is the moment that i live for
i can smell the ocean air.
and here i am
pouring my heart on to these rooftops.
just a ghost
to the world.
thats exactly
exactly what i need.

kaiser9 @ 2004-08-18T21:48:00

2004-08-19T02:48:52Z

hey everyone

school starts in one week
i can't believe summer is almost over
but the again i can
because i've done a lot this summer.
i'm ready to go back tho.
i didn't make the vball team
surprise surprise
its k tho because now i have more time n that i can spend with my baby.
i'm just upset that some people made it that shouldn't of
ya kno how that is
on the subject of my baby
nick is still on vacation and he stoped callin me.. tear.
he usually calls me every night before i go to sleep.
its wierd tho him not callin me... its like i can't fall asleep with out hearin his voice. i duno. i love him so much.
mayb its bc long distance costs to much.. i duno i don't wanna think about it.
well i'm out cuz i hav nothing good to report.

LoVE!

kaiser9 @ 2004-08-05T12:35:00

2004-08-05T17:36:13Z

Picking up the pieces of a life you’ve broken
Stitching it together with the seams wide open

You keep crying, crying, crying
Till you cannot see at all
You keep crying, crying, crying
Till you cannot breathe at all
What do you do when you’re alone?
What do you do when no one’s home?
What do you do when you’re alone?
Out of control, Now on your own

Never waking up
The alarm is broken
Running in a dream and it’s like slow motion

kaiser9 @ 2004-07-30T13:33:00

2004-07-30T18:37:00Z

the truth...
is you could slit my throat

and with my on last gasping breath
i'd apologize
for bleeding on your shirt.

WAPRED BABY!

2004-07-25T05:00:13Z

warped tour was the this year! omg it was soooooooo much fun! uh... i like it like that! haha monica. that song has been stuck in my head forever! o but we saw story of the year, New found Glory, Simple Plan, Coheed and Cambria, Bad religion, Matchbox Romance, Taking back sunday, yellowcard, Sugarcult and some other great bands! o it was the best. we were in the middle of like all the mash pits. we were almost in the front for new found glory, we were like one row of people from the front at yellow card and monica was in the front at sugarcult. i was in front of her!! i got passed over the bar 6 times because i was body surfing! hell hell to all of us who did! [alex, ,melissa, camille, and michelle] too bad monica was in a skirt! haha but that didn't stop that one guy from goin up her skirt? did we ever even find out who that was? nah, i guess we didn't. who else did we see there? well nina and her cuz came with us but i didn't see very much of her but we still had fun when we were waiting around. uhh elyse was there with mike and so was lindsay and lisel. and lydia and lissa. yea we had fun. o well... now i'm off to more partayin with maca!!! love you all! can't wait to see nick tomarrow too! i mean i didn't even get to see him thursday and it was our six month! sad... *tear* buh bye to allz!

*k4!$3r*

kaiser9 @ 2004-07-14T19:27:00

2004-07-15T00:35:57Z

i'm here too you kno
and i'm livin my own life.
its not all about you
and it never will be
i will continue to live the way i am livin
without the restrictions and limitations you put on me
i'm just a kid and you can't expect the world of me
just like you i am human
this means i am capable of making mistakes
and i will
you have to learn that and recognize that i know whats wrong and right.

there is something missing between us
we aren't clicking like we used to
don't leave me here on the road all alone
take me where you are goin.
i dont wanna lose you.
when we talk it seems as thought you don't want to hear what i have to say.
do you even care any more?

kaiser9 @ 2004-07-07T16:57:00

2004-07-07T22:12:41Z

you end the chaos in my life with the smile of your face. in your arms the world falls into place and everything is the way it is supposed to be. when i'm with you we are in our own world. and i'm happy here.

kaiser9 @ 2004-07-06T12:29:00

2004-07-06T17:29:33Z

words pour out of your mouth like rain.

your yells are worse than thunder and

your lightning kisses my face and leaves a mark behind. it stings and tears come to my eyes to add to your rain... but

i won't let them. i won't give you the satisfaction of me crying.

you won't win this one.

if only i could tell you

2004-07-06T04:35:33Z

i sit here and see the blank screen in front of my face. i am trying to put to words the thoughts that come rolling into my head right now but they can't be explained. one person can take your world and turn it up-side down and shake you from it and watch you fall until you hit rock bottom... the end. nothing is there for you anymore.

thats what your doing to me. you don't realize it but by your love you hurt me in ways that you don't even know... your keeping from so many things and i can't choke back the tears to tell you this. when i try my words don't do anything but aggravate you. i'm fustrated. how can you tell a person they are wrong when they are convinced that they are so right. by doin this your killling me, slow and painful it is too and i /hate/ you for it. why can't you see it my way. i can be right too.

i try to trun my anger away and just put it in that little place that i keep it when you do this to me but there's no space left. you can't keep doing this to me.

then after we have the little talk... well actually its not little at all. you keep prisonor in your room while you drone on and on about 'shit' that i don't care about. don't you know that i'm not listening to you? secretly i am singing a song that i have had stuck in my head for the past few days or thinking about how i can't wait to see my boyfriend tonight or tomarrow. i'm not listening to you. i never have.

you have this image that i am someone that i'm not. your expectations are making me the way that i am even if you don't know that i am this way. why do you do this to me?

*k4!$3r*

kaiser9 @ 2004-06-30T16:26:00

2004-06-30T21:37:24Z

wow... what a couple of weeks!

it seems like it has been forever since i have written in here. Lately life has been really fun for me... especially with nick angela and bryon downtown. nick... anyday you feel like switching clothes, you got it buddy! damn you looked y in mine!

Nina! i know you have been having sum ruff times right now but i love you soo much . i can relate to what your going throught to a certain level... any time ya need me i'm here for you ! man.. its been psycho mom week thought with both of our moms!

Nina and Melissa! wow that saraphine concert kicked ass!!! o i am so glad we went together! i had so much fun even when we almost died going on the "Mega Drop" thing that i was almost sure was going to fall over and kill us! o but it was fun! i love you both!! we all need to hang out a lot more especially you and me melissa! i have so much fun when your around!

yesterday i went to nick's house and my mom like totally psyched out on me... and i would totally say sorry and kiss up to her if i did something wrong but i didn't at all so instead i got into a fight with her. today i have f*ckin cheerleading and tomaro i am goin to ribfest to see sugar ray i think... not a big fan but they used to be pretty big so i guess its cool n'shit. well i'm out bc if i don't do the dishes then i'll be grounded for even longer... god i it when parents do that. geez... how gay. latar!

*k4!$3r*

kaiser9 @ 2004-06-18T18:48:00

2004-06-18T23:51:34Z

this week sux! ari can't come over... jessica is in indiana or where ever, melissa is in colorado and NICK IS IN OHIO! i havn't seen him in forever! and i don't get to until sunday night when he comes back or wednesday when he stops working! boohiss! man... now this has become the most boringest summer ever! o well... next week i get to go out with ari atleast. well i'm out to finish watching friend and plus my dinner is ready... lata gatas!

*k4!$3r*

kaiser9 @ 2004-06-16T10:06:00

2004-06-16T15:06:28Z

hey everyone! i got my tonisls taken out yesterday. so that kinda sucked... but the good news is i got A LOT of cool !! i have 10 balloons right now! tehee! i have 4 get well balloons, 4 regular latex ones and they are azul, amarillo, blanco, y anaranjado and then nina and donna and caley gave me this HUGE and totally cool patrick balloon and i am guessin that the little minnie mouse one is from sambos... which is still a really cool balloon bc it is on a stick. then i got 3 boquets of flowers from my mom and my cousin marinna and my cousin amanda and then my grandma gave me the first 3 seasons of friends, and the jones' gave me a carebear stuffed animal that talks!!! and then my family gave me 2 t-shirts, a watch a HUGE patrick stuffed animal, and a cool spongebob beach towel! then today some guy rings the door bell and i got those cool cookies on a stick with cool pictures on them that are REALLY good so right now i feel REALLY loved and i'm like omg! if i'm gonna get this much stuff after surgery isn't there something else i could get done?? lol well my phone is ringing so hasta lavista babys!!

Love you all!
k4!$3r

kaiser9 @ 2004-06-13T21:16:00

2004-06-14T02:28:16Z

hey everyone! i saw garfield or w/e with nick last night and he fell asleep!!! haha! then today nina calls me up at like 9 in the morning to ask if i want to go running with her! i was like... thats why you called me and woke me up, but i went with her and then she went to chicago on my dad's boat with me... fun right nina? yea... nina almost got hit in the head with the boom and she was totally freaking out when it started to tip! it was funny. then we got back to the dock bc it started to rain and we went swimming!!! omg it was sooooo cold i wouldn't of gone back in but i HAD to rescue the floating buoy! i couldn't let it be all alone!! but seriously it was like jumping iton the lake in the middle of january!! o soo cold... our bodys went numb and it was REALLY hard to breathe! i thought i got stabbed like 10000000000000000000000 times all % i stayed in there for almost 20 minutes all by my lonesome but nina jumped back in occasionally. then we went to ed debevics and nina me and mi madre got lost going there so we sat there for a few and then finally figured out where we were goin. then on the way back mi padre told us to go the wrong way so we got lost again! quite funny. well thats about it. now me and nina are off to watch a movie! love you all tonz!!

*k4!$3r*

kaiser9 @ 2004-06-12T16:11:00

2004-06-12T21:42:53Z

hey everyone! summer is finally here! yay yay! thanks to everyone for helping me get through last year... it was hell! it thought it would never be over...

Erwin: the bus rides were great! and so was tic-tac-toe in fmp.. it will never be the same... thats the new way to play! luv ya! every day this summer!

Thomas: physics would have never been so much fun without you! and hang man and all those things in fmp!

Ari: god... i am so glad we became friends even though you hated me! Word Pro was awesome! i would have dropped that class if it wasn't for you [and mere] you mean so much to me now! but who knows if i'll b able to hang with you this summer! lol... love ya tonz!

Mere: finish! that word has a whole different meaning now! its so great you don't give me those death looks any more! lol... i'm so glad we become friends.

carolyn: wow... your not blonde but i think you were in a previous life! fudge doesn't melt!!!!!! live with it! your awesome! we need to a=hang out more this summer!

Elliott and everyone who was there!: chinese funeral... clever... so very cool! haha... you all know how to party! can't wait to hang out with you and jesse and erwin and carolyn and schlumpf and... who else was there... grace...but i don't think she likes me but o well!... and priya and all of them! i still can't believe erwin hit me with that tennis ball! i still hav to get her back!

Nina: we've had our ups and downs this year... hopefully summer will be better! call me! i'm still here for you no matter what!

Melissa: this year has been fun with you... yowga forever! lol we need to hang out more!

Alex: are you ever going to call me for lacrosse? geez! lol... the locker was amazing with you! call me if you ever want to go to 6 flags!! lol! i love ya babe!

Amanda, molly, angela: you guyz are amazing! i am so glad i met you all! you guyz definatly need to call me over the summer... molly and amanda we can go to subway again! yay and angela... meijers will never be the same with out you!

Nick: i got through school knowing that you would be outside my class waiting for me. i'm so glad that i'm dating you now. life wouldn't be the same without you in it! you mean so much to meeven though your an ass [with a nice one i might add] o and whats the score so far? 3-1??? remember that for next time! i love you baby!

aHH!!

2004-05-31T00:42:04Z

i definatly just got out of my basement because of a stupid tornado warning! aHH! [not really] i member when tornados and stuf like lightning was really scary but nor i could really care less. i went to the mall today and got some new things. and today is Sunday and there's not school monday and ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOMMARROW! i'm so excited!:) but right now i am really tired and i want to go to bed but i'm waiting for nick to see if i go out tonight or tommarrow. well i'm checkin out! love ya

*K4!$3R*

kaiser9 @ 2004-05-26T19:09:00

2004-05-27T00:16:39Z

ok when i last left off i went to go get a manicure and pedicure. now that i have been cleaning for 2 days [just so that ari can come on my dad's boat] it has taken me forever but i think i am finally almost done with ALL my laundry! i've done like 6 loads and the last one is in the dryer[finally] happy bday to erwin! he turns fifteen manana and i turn fifteen on monday everyone!!! YAYAYAYAYA! finally my madre will give me my amp for my guitar! o and i don't have cheerleading today becasue we GOT OUR PITS FILLED! o i am SOOOO excited now bc i have tumbling on saturday and i am going to play in them nonstop and no one will be ablt to pull me out of there for ANYTHING o and its lauren's bday too so it's all good! yea yea! well i'm out like a fat kid in dodge ball![american idol finale! go fantasia!] adios amigos!
Luv,
*K4!$3R*

kaiser9 @ 2004-05-22T14:58:00

2004-05-22T20:01:05Z

what is going on with the rest of the world? i have so much hwork to do but i am so lazy and i'll just do it before i go to bed tomaro. yesterday i went to ari's and we had lotz of fun... i kicked her ass in everything we did i gotta go so i'll finish this when i get back.

*K4!$3R*

kaiser9 @ 2004-05-20T22:02:00

2004-05-21T03:10:36Z

hey guys... what a long week. only like 13 days left til summer! i can't wait! ahh... went to the freshman boys volleyball game today with ari and erwin adn people and we went to chipotle or however you spell it too and i had two burritos and chips woohoo ari! haha. well then nina picked me up and we went to coldstone even tho i feel bad about it now bc i kinda just left ari! i love you ... but then we went back to my house and chilled until her mom came and picked her up around 30 minutes ago even tho they just left like not even 2 minutes ago... we were all in the hottub and me and nina still had our clothes on lol nina like that one time you and me and alex gave sambos a bath... good times good times. tomaro i get to go home with ari adn i'm excited! we are gunna have so much fun . well i'm off to bed because nick isn't home or online or anything... wait! he just signed on! well i'm off anyways luv you allz!

*K4!$3R*

kaiser9 @ 2004-05-17T17:49:00

2004-05-17T22:55:48Z

hey guys! i have to go to cheerleading really soon. i don't feel up to it. do i ever... o well i think it actually might b ok bc i'm going to miss like all the hard parts like jumping and standing tumbling. yay and then i don't have to run and my coach isn't going to push what i can do so i'm so happy! bad news is tho on the 15th of june i have to get my tonsils taken out. damn... :(! well i have to change my shirt and stuf before i go to cheerleading so i will talk to you all later!

jerry

2004-05-15T19:17:57Z

hey guys whats up? i have lots to rite about now!
haha. well as many of you know lauren's chinchilla travis died on thursday it it was very sad *tear* ari should know because she was on the phone with me for like 3 hours while travis was dying! omg it was really sad because lauren was bawling really hard and my mom was in Boston, Mass. and my dad was at karate so no one but me and lauren was home! i didn't know what do do so like every thirty seconds i'd be like ari! hold on. haha i'm sry . well then after our half day on Friday i was home all by myself because lauren went to gino's with all of her friends but that was ok because my phones were ringing off the hook! haha i felt so special... except when nick hung up on me which by the way was NOT nice nicholas. uh. then me, thomas, ari and nick went and saw Godsend which was a REALLY good movie and i know this bc i watched ALL of it my friends. wow ari was like grabbing me at all the freaky parts and nick was jumping out of his seat on my lap and me and katie would jump to but then start to laugh at them both because they were scared and it was funny. then we went to cold stone. o cold stone. i now love that place. the guy there gave me a medium for the price of a small! it was awesome and i didn't even ask for a medium. nick looked kinda mad tho when this happened. haha. well then we got home at like 11 and then i went upstairs bc my baby sis was upstairs all aone and i felt bad bc she kept callin me asking when i'd be home. so we chilled til like 12 and thne we just crashed in my mom's bed until she got home and she got me a harvard sweatshirt and i was like, mom not now show me in the morning bc i was so tired and i don't know why. i think it was because all the lights were out an we were laying in a bed with the tv on mute. haha. that might do it. well then today at tumbling i had privates with toni but i couldn't tumble very well because of the steriods i'm on so i just basically did ladders round-off flip flops and did dround-off lays and fulls on the tramp becuase i was too tired to do anything else. now i get to take it easy at like practice and everything until i get my tonsils out which is most likely gonna be sometime this summer but i'm going to milk it as long as i can! haha maggie! ok this is really long so i'm going to finish up with the good news. today lauren got another chinchilla so she is happy again and she well actually i named it jerry like the mouse in tom 'n' jerry and he's only a little baby and is so cute!!! well i'm off to do . hopefully nina will call me later like she said she would! bye guys! i love you all [especially you nick!]

*K4!$3R*

O i forgot! i got another fish!!! haha! i'm going to name him jaque like the shrimp in finding nemo! adios!

One Tree Hill

2004-05-12T02:33:41Z

what the HeLL was with that f'in episode? i CANNOT wait until next season to see what happened man. urg! keith and deb have ? haley and nathan get god damn married. dan is gunna die! and lucas! don't even get me started! how could they let him miss that shot and then how can he freakin be moving away?! damn it all to hell! michael barret! CHANNEL 9, CHANNEL 9!! OOOOOOOHHHHH!!!! haha nina! he is the new farnsworth man! o well peace out!

*K4!$3R*

By the way a 2 inch cetipede just crawled out from under the sink and it was REALLY gross!

kissy kissy

2004-05-10T02:32:12Z

well... i was watching the news bc the tv was on and they had this thing on kissing. so i was like, hmm.. this is interesting. the said that kissing i actually good for you because it keeps you healthy, improves your relationship with someone, keeps you looking younger and you can burn like 2 calories a minute or something like that o and it "exercises" your lips and toungue. huh! just thought that was interesting and thought i would share that with the rest of you! lata gatas

*K4!$3R*

kaiser9 @ 2004-05-09T21:08:00

2004-05-10T02:19:33Z

havn't written in a while so i decided to because i have some stuff to write about. i got my guitar on friday i think. and i have been playin around with it ever since. my fingers are starting to bleed now. it came with a book teachin me how to play and so far i can play 23 of the "songs" in there. havn't done too much this weekend. on friday i basically just hung out and watched movies. on saturday i had to go out to dinner with my grandma for mother's day. then we ditched out early and then i went to nick's house and we went to the park till about 10:30 and i'd say it was fun! ha. today i had to babysit in the morning then i went out with my cousins and my aunt and my god-daughter and my grandma and my mom and we went to the four lakes place in palatine and we feed the geese which was actually really fun to my surprise then we played at the park. then we left and then went to go see mean s, which was a good movie. now i am going to start playing around with my guitar some more so peace out ya'll! ha ah!!

*K4!$3R*

kaiser9 @ 2004-05-04T16:36:00

2004-05-04T21:37:22Z

shout out to my two Yowga gurlies! haha! ya'll rock my sox!!! ha! luv ya

kaiser9 @ 2004-05-04T16:29:00

2004-05-04T21:35:39Z

hey guys! well. the doctor called today and i turned out positive for two of my tests. the good news is it wasn't herpies! yay! but i do have two viruses that cause mono which sux and now i hav to go see an ENT [ears nose and throut nick! not emergancy medical technition!] and then, hah, in gym class today i was tumbling and my pants are too big and my pants fell down when i was flipping so i didn't land my flip AND every saw my A*S*S! damn! i hav boy gym leaders too which sux! man! well one tree hill is on tonight so thats makes me happy but i hav to take jumbo horse pills again so that makes me sad. o well... i'm out luv ya all

*K41$3R*